How do we forgive? How do we forgive ourselves when we can’t yet forgive? How do we at least move towards it and soften in that direction and- really- let’s look at the benefits of actual lived forgiveness instead of the typical “you should forgive” platitude. Ultimately the internal process of forgiveness can be the most powerful healing remedy both for ourselves and also for the world.
Today we’re having a conversation with Lissa Boles of The Soul Map about purpose. We touch on conscious culture making, how actively intending to change culture is an extraordinary thing- and really uniquely front and center at this particular time in human history. We get at how to recognize that we are part of a creative process and how to see our lives signs and signals as cues to our own unique process and right work. We also touch on the trouble with “I don’t know” which, if you’ve heard me say it before, tends to be one of my favorite mantras, but Lissa exposes its shadow side here.
In this episode we’re talking with John Lockley, a South African Sangoma and author of the book Leopard Warrior, what it means to be fully human, how aliveness can be a messenger of our purpose, cultural appropriation, how to heal your ancestral lineage, the danger of avoiding the shadow, and aligning with your own wild nature. John shared with us that his reason for doing this work is to support people in becoming intoxicated with the sweet spirit of Mother Nature, and you can feel it in his words.
This episode is a meditation and chant from African Sangoma John Lockley. He was kind enough to share this with us during our conversation with him and we decided to make it a bonus episode so that you can easily return to it and connect with it for your own practice.
We are very recently back from a weekend retreat with Matt Kahn at Multiversity 1440 in California. This talk was recorded pretty much immediately after we returned home and we were truly deep in digestion mode, as we continue to be. However, from through the fog of integration time we brought forward just a few of the threads that we resonant for us in a weekend that we both found remarkably transformative and powerful.
This has been an exploration for us for a while now in our own lives, and in many of our episodes. In today’s conversation we get into topics such as how concepts like blame, deserve and fairness are beliefs that can contribute to problematizing tendencies, how making ourselves into a problem is an epidemic, how to see life through a different kind of lens, and how to hold yourself from the part of you that knows there is nothing to solve.
Is it possible that the more challenging aspects of life are supposed to affect us a lot? To touch our hearts deeply? To hurt even? Why do we make suffering- our own and others- a problem rather than just a part of our alive nature? What we may not realize when we begin these practices that the root question of the spiritual path is actually, "Are you going to live or not?"
John J. Prendergast, PhD, is a psychotherapist, spiritual teacher, and author of the book In Touch: How to Tune In to the Inner Guidance of Your Body and Trust Yourself. Both in reading his book, and after Brooke sat with him on a weekend retreat recently we knew we needed to bring him on for a conversation we could share with all of you about what it means to really land in your heart and live from there.
Today we’re talking about how extraordinary it is to come home to our ordinariness. One of my favorite Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche quotes is: “we have to be willing to be completely ordinary.” In a culture where the goal is always to become extra special, more unique, more successful, or just to strive towards being a somebody it’s worth pondering what the true gifts are of allowing yourself to rest in your ordinariness.
After reading a question from a listener who was exploring the merits of being a “positive person” versus embodying a state of authenticity, we got deeply curious. We went to town exploring this topic covering heavy hitting questions like; what happens when the idea that we should be positive actually evokes states of shame that inhibit presence and healing? What is the soil for genuine positivity? Can our attachment to being happy decrease our ability to be genuinely positive?
We're pondering the age old question, “Am I responsible for others?” It’s a trickier question than at first glance- it can be utilized and lived out in a myriad of ways. If we can’t fix, control or save people, and if doing the spiritual person disappearing act isn’t helpful, what does genuine responsibility to one another look like?
This week’s episode is about exploring the ways in which we can come to identify with ourselves as “someone with problems.” Acknowledging aspects of ourselves that are unhealed or messy can be painful, yet we can still have this funny way of seeing and representing ourselves as the broken one.
It seems in spiritual worlds we swing the pendulum between ignoring the body completely to making it the total focus of attention. What do those extremes look like and what might a useful middle way be?
In this episode we’re talking about what happens when you lose the sense that you “have it all together.” As humans we’re always trying to pin things down. We want to categorize, create step-by-step action plans, essentially identify and solidify life, including ourselves. As we evolve on our own paths, we’re noticing that our ability to conceive of ourselves as people who have it all together is slipping through our fingers, and we’ve got a lot to say about why that’s challenging. In the process though, we’re also offering a potential new way to orient towards life as the ability to pin things down falls away.
In this conversation we get into our own tender spots, as we always do, but this time with gifted teacher Jeannie Zandi holding space. We talk about inadequacy and unworthiness, fear, outright terror, and the desire to finally get it together and have it all tidied up. We discuss trauma, the inner tendency to push and to eradicate all the “badness” in us, and our dominant culture of unhealthy yang from within which can barely even fathom healthy yin. We talk dark night, the creature of the body, and mercy, mercy, mercy for this whole human journey.
Today we’re talking about what can be called the “unseen worlds.” We’re all connected to vast amounts of wisdom and resources, yet so often we’re not consciously aware of it. Naturally, much of this talk circles back to major themes such as learning to listen and trusting your life.
We all want more peacefulness but we can’t tranquilize ourselves into peacefulness. When we use our paths as a kind of energetic lid on things we don’t want to face t’s not just a desire for peace- it is a fear mechanism. We talk about how the labor of facing the things that aren’t in alignment for us can indeed be painful, but as with any birth there is something else on the other side of all that labor.
In this episode we get into what our thoughts and personal experiences are on what awakening actually means, why we find it vulnerable to talk about, and of course how we support ourselves in what we believe is the path towards living our fullest human potential.
Today’s episode is a Dear Bliss and Grit- which means one of our lovely listeners wrote us in a question and we had a bunch to say about it! Thank you Jeannie for emailing this one over. Jeannie’s question gets to the heart of attachment issues and spirituality. We unpack what the different attachment styles are, and how we can often choose spiritual practices and paths that can deepen our own attachment issues. And ultimately how can we work with self-compassion and loving whatever arises to make ourselves more available for secure and satisfying bonding with others.
We're thinking about the role the nervous system might play in our awakening to truth. We talk a lot about concepts like fear vs love, or fear vs clarity, but is there benefit to exploring fear through the lens of our nervous system and limbic brain? Does that exploration create more softness in us, or does it trigger a shame spiral that births more fear?