Over the weekend we found ourselves having a chat over coffee about our experiences the last year and how clear it’s become that expectations can shape our perception, and therefore our reality. For example, we’ve both been told by doctors that we could never heal things that we’ve healed. We are told by our culture that we are good/bad, right/wrong, strong/weak, limitless/limited. Depending on the information we receive it can buoy us into our potentiality or sink us into hopelessness. We all have expectations, that not only inform our behaviors, but influence how we will experience reality through our 5 senses. These expectations are sometimes invisible, like the air we breathe, yet are effecting us greatly.
This week we are answering a patron’s question about something that is up for them in their life. It contains a lot of nuance about how to be with other people’s emotions without feeling overwhelmed, as well as how to receive kindness and love without feeling overwhelmed by that either. The shortened version of the question is: “When I do let myself feel my emotions deeply I frequently get super overwhelmed and times that I am center of attention or receiving heartfelt love and support are still very uncomfortable for me in groups. Why is it so difficult to feel deep emotion in myself and from others still?”
In this episode we are speaking about:
What the fawn survival strategy is and how it can look in your life
How one can address trauma and limiting beliefs through somatic interventions
How to work with one’s nervous system in an intelligent way.
In this episode we both speak about limiting identities we are each up against that are related to hiding. How might our genuine values be co-opted by ego identities that keep us small? How do these identities require an unfriendly imaginary audience? And when we engage in this kind of “othering”, via imagining other people as the judge and jury, how do we project an unfriendly universe onto everyone in advance of any actual friction? Once we can see that all operating, how do we untangle these subtle layers so that we can experience more and more of life without being led by the question, “Do they like it?”
Today we are discussing what we could call living from truth. I had an experience not long back where a mentor of mine was asking me to say exactly what I wanted, and I noticed a freeze response. This opened up for me a new depth of experience around what it really can feel like to live from truth, as opposed to following the momentum of past conditioning and habits. Many of us say we want to be authentic or know our true nature, or the truth of reality, but what does that really mean? We’re kicking it off by getting into some teachings from Adyashanti, and of course diving into our own experiences and challenges in stepping into greater alignment with our inner truth.
We are talking with Dr. Gail Brenner, a clinical psychologist whose practice and teachings are unique because of her nondual perspective grounded in deep and practical truths about peace and happiness. She is the author of two books, The End of Self-Help, and Suffering is Optional. We are primarily discussing her most recent book, Suffering is Optional. You can find more on Gail’s work at www.gailbrenner.com
For this episode we zoomed out and explored: What is Bliss+Grit about exactly? More specifically, after nearly three years, 127 episodes and lots of personal healing, inquiry, and exposure to different teachers and practices: What is our working model of healing and transformation? How does conditioning store in us and how to we untangle that? And, importantly, if we aren’t our conditioning, what are we? It’s an ongoing lived inquiry more than a nailed down blueprint, and it’s more about building bridges between systems that are evocative of human potential rather than of picking a team and declaring it the winner
In this episode we are sharing our conversation with our guest Jill Blakeway. Jill is the founder and director of The YinOva Center in New York City and the author of several books, including her most recent book Energy Medicine. Together we discuss: What resonant bonds are and why they’re important to understand, research that shows how the power of our minds can affect machines, teachings Neale Donald Walsh with Jill on manifestation and choosing love vs fear, proven healings that can happen through energy fields, how interconnected we all are and the research that proves it, how to adjust your energy field in working with patients, how “energized” cell medium was found to change cancer markers in cells, what a “meaning field” is and why that’s important, research on charlatans in the healing and spiritual worlds.
This is one of our favorite kinds of conversations: where the nervous system, trauma responses, and the spiritual path intersect. We are looking at the four F’s of trauma response: fight, flight, freeze, and fawn. We are talking about how these normal, healthy responses can become identities and therefore keep us from fully nourishing lives. And in particular we are honing in on fawn, also called please, appease, or tend and befriend, since we haven’t spoken in as much detail about this particular response. But boy howdy do we know it from the inside out! If you consider yourself an empath, this one might strike a chord for you too.
This is the second part to last week’s conversation with the author, speaker, and teacher Will Pye on his newest book, The Gratitude Prescription. We first interviewed Will almost a year back on his book Blessed with a Brain Tumor and enjoyed our talk so much that we invited him back to hear more about what he calls ‘radical gratitude.’ As someone who had a spiritual awakening in the aftermath of receiving a diagnosis of brain cancer, we find his teachings and recommended practices of gratitude to be very embodied, grounded and deep.
Today we are speaking with Will Pye for a second time! Will is an author, speaker, and teacher, and we had our first conversation with him about his first book, Blessed with a Brain Tumor, and today we are talking about his most recent book, The Gratitude Prescription. The embodied practice of gratitude has become a centrally important part of our own practices this year, and so we wanted to talk with Will about the deeply experiential practice of gratitude and how it is fundamental to the functioning of the human being, and how it can actually change your life.
Today we are sharing the second part of our conversation with our guest Lisa Wimberger. Lisa is the creator of Neurosculpting, which is a self-directed neuroplasticity protocol. Specifically, it is a mental training process that quiets our fight-or-flight center and activates our prefrontal cortex, which is the mind’s seat of our compassion and empathy. We had so much to discuss that we made this interview a two-parter.
We have a special guest today: Lisa Wimberger. Lisa is the creator of Neurosculpting, which is a self-directed neuroplasticity protocol. Specifically, it is a mental training process that quiets our fight-or-flight center and activates our prefrontal cortex, which is the mind’s seat of our compassion and empathy. Needless to say, we had a lot to talk about. In fact, We so many shared passions and inquiries in common with Lisa that we are airing this conversation as a 2-parter. Stay tuned next week.
Have you ever worried that if you were to truly shine as bright as you could you would make others uncomfortable? Or have you noticed moments where you shut down your own potential or thriving? You also may believe that your needs, your emotions or your presence is just simply too much for people. The fear of “being too much” can be a very common one, especially in empathic circles, and can create patterns of inhibition that keep us settling for less-than.
Today we are talking about the rules we may have made in our lives, that at some point, gave us a frame of reference in how to navigate life in a sane and mature way. Also, those moments in life when we are asked to figure out if those rules are to be followed to the letter, or if a more subtle discernment is called for.
In this episode, we are speaking about the phenomenon of guru misconduct. From shaming and judgment to outright abuse, there is a long history of spiritual figures engaging inappropriately with those they’re meant to guide. Yet these days it seems as if there is a new teacher exposed every few months. This is a big topic, that we could barely scratch the surface on, but in light of our recent discussions on relationships and safety, and because we do speak about so many teachers, we felt like it was time to add our voices to the conversation. We touch on how this can happen, but more so, what signs we may look for to identify an unethical, unsafe or ego-driven teacher.
This week is a flashback Tuesday! This episode, The Implications of Basic Trust, originally aired in September of 2018. We both remember this conversation as the beginning of what felt like a big shift for each of us, the kind of epiphany that seems so obvious, but is in fact quite huge: that we can trust this life.
By the time this began to be a real lived experience for us, we had sat with the phrase “trust your life” for at least a couple of years. So it was fun to listen back and note that understanding things and experiencing things are really different.
We’ve noticed personally that what truly bonds us to others and lets us feel loved is presence in the form of interest and curiosity. Yet, our cultural and familial models are often missing this key ingredient. In this talk we cover a tangible way to look at if you’re present, how ego agendas can lead to self-fulfilling prophecies, how an overstimulated nervous system can pull you away from presence, ways to experience genuine connection and how the conversation of ‘doing vs being’ can also apply to the way we communicate.
Today we are honing in on how we find safety in the world and in our relationships, whether those relationships are with intimate partners, or our children, friends, coworkers,etc. n particular we are using the lens of Stephen Porges’s Polyvagal theory to look more closely at what happens when we don’t detect safety, and the magical things that can happen when our nervous systems do detect safety and therefore do not have to be defensive.
In this episode we are going into much greater detail about what it tangibly looks and feels like to heal through self-love. Our conversation covers everything from neuroscience to personal experiences to practical exercises where we can learn how to bring love to the parts of ourselves that need it the most.